One Sure Way to Reduce Anxiety
This past week I finished a lovely book by Christy Wright for women starting their own businesses (link at the end of this post).
Towards the end of her book, Christy addresses a psychological issue related to increasing what I call joyful productivity and decreasing anxiety, namely: "Stop Doing What Doesn't Matter".
Here is a powerful, direct quotation from her book:
"A lot of the stress and feelings of being overwhelmed in our lives come not from doing too many things, but from doing the wrong things. We say yes when we mean no, and we commit to things that we end up resenting and regretting later. We stare at our phones and miss what's going on right in front of us. We do things out of guilt or obligation, then get mad about it. We end up grumpy and disappointed about how we are spending our lives. There are a lot of things that take up our time that aren't important and don't actually matter to us...So if we ant to create more balance, we've got to intentionally take control of what we spend our time on." (pp. 284-5).
I don't know about you, but reading this was a huge wake-up reminder for me (yes, I made up the term "wake-up reminder" to explain something I already had a "wake-up call" to but haven't been applying lately). Maybe it's because I'm more of a "yes" person, though I've been working on being less so in the last couple of years.
Regardless, the idea that stress and being overwhelmed may not just be about doing too many things but about doing the wrong things, was profound for me.
It follows, then, that one way to reduce anxiety is to say "NO!" to things that don't matter.
I hear you asking, "But how do I know what matters?"
Christy suggests asking yourself whether you need to put your phone down more often and experience things around you, or whether you need to quit a commitment that your heart is no longer into, or whether you need to "say no more often to the endless requests people have of you" (p. 285). I can sure relate to that last one!
But here's the crux: It's up to you to stop doing things that don't matter and make time for things that do.
I know it's not easy for some of you to say "No" (and for those for who it is not, I envy you! haha). As Christy says, "No" is a complete sentence and you don't need a reason or excuse; you just have the responsibility to say it! I love that!
So, I challenge you, Real Academics: Ask yourself what is important? Then, what is one thing you can say "no" to in order to allow for at least one thing that matters? Then, go say "no". Be brave. I know you can do it!
Until next time,
Maggie
“As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases.”
P.S. If anyone is interested in Christy's book, Business Boutique, here is the link:
(paid link)
I also blogged about her new book release here: What's the Secret to Life Balance? The Answers Here May Surprise You
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